Galina Tymoshenko: “Learn to enjoy life”
Are you happy with anything? This means that you are not happy with anything that you have tried.
How to get joy from life in any circumstances, discusses the psychologist and TV presenter Galina Tymoshenko.
Tell me honestly, do you see a fundamental difference between the slogans "People and the party are one", "We are for a healthy lifestyle" and "We must enjoy life"? Personally, I do not. The slogan, he is the slogan. Available but not implemented. What is being done is usually called differently - a cry, for example. To raise people, say, for war, for fire or for pogrom, a cry is required. The slogan will not work.
By the way, why doesn't it work? Yes, because from it it is not clear what it is-the unity of the party and the people, why this is necessary and how to do it. The slogan's task is fundamentally different. Which one? Of course, you can’t talk about everything in the world slogans, but about the slogan “We must enjoy life” we can say this. This slogan is used in one single case: when a person comes to you to complain and understand why he is feeling bad and think how to help him, you have no desire. You say to him: “You just need to learn how to enjoy life,” and that's the end. It seems like he didn’t wave away a man, and he didn’t spend a second of his precious time and calories of his energy.
And whoever makes this call (girlfriend, psychologist, co-worker or someone else), he has no other practical value. All the same, after all, not a bit is clear what it means to enjoy life, what it gives and how to learn it.
But at the same time, everyone somehow implicitly understands that enjoying life is probably great. It remains to find out one thing: HOW TO DO IT.
I know only two ways to learn how to enjoy life.
First way is to translate the slogan into a cry status. The basis of this translation is very simple.
Remember how many times you said: “Yes, with my head, I understand everything, I just do it differently ...” Do you know why you are doing completely different from what your smart head understands? Yes, because at this moment your head and your feelings understand the situation in completely different ways. This is the slogan. And a cry is just when the head and the heart say the same thing. Feelings, they, like the body, do not know how to lie. Therefore, if they support the head in any case, there is no doubt that their joint plans will be successfully implemented.
So, all that is needed is to find the wording of the slogan “We must enjoy life”, which will be supported by feelings. Moreover, feelings usually only support what they understand. But they don’t understand such words as “necessary”, “duty” and the like. Therefore, we need only to pick up words that for us would not only be filled with some meaningful intellectual content, but also equally meaningfully and definitely emotionally colored.
For example, I know one person who witnessed how a car drove to a bus stop and crushed three. Since then, it is enough for this person to utter the phrase “But I am alive!” - and he immediately begins to desperately enjoy life, and quite sincerely. Maybe not too humane - but it works! Yes, and with humanity there is still a big question: he does not throw bricks on other people and does not push them under cars to make sure once again that he himself is alive. Once was completely enough.
This, of course, does not mean at all that any other person, even who has also witnessed someone's death, will also begin to rejoice, uttering the same phrase to himself. The whole trick is precisely that, to find such a phrase inside yourself completely independently. And this phrase can be incredibly exotic, at first glance in no way related to the theme of joy in life unrelated. “Oh, all of them!”, “The sky is blue,” “Hurray!” - Anything will fit, if only it was at some point felt by every cell of the body.
Of course, this method has its own traps. For example, do not confuse the cry with the auto-training formula. Once I had a 60-year-old woman with a bouquet of illnesses at my appointment that she would not leave the house without an impressive first-aid kit. So, she was decisively disappointed in auto-training after she kept saying to herself: “I am getting younger, more beautiful and healthier every day.” Of course, we all know how to lie to ourselves, but we still need to know the measure ...
Another subtlety of cry technology: do not tie your cry for favorable circumstances. Let's say the phrase “Everything will be fine” does not work, and that’s it! Because EVERYTHING doesn’t happen well - the laws of physics do not allow: if it increases somewhere, then somewhere it will surely decrease ...
And one more thing: it is clear that in order to find one's own joyful cry, this joy - real, to the depths of the soul - must still be experienced at least once. Otherwise, the slogan will turn out again.
Second way even more obvious. It is quite enough to find out what your actions give you joy, and to learn how to carry out these actions in any life circumstances. After all, it is not necessary to rejoice at the fact that the rain is falling or the sun is shining. You and your actions are also life, and if the world around you is not too concerned about delivering you pleasant moments, then you yourself can take care of this?
Of course, in this case, your chances of success (in the sense of constant joy in life) are the higher, the more your actions in principle can bring you joy and the more ways you can carry out these actions, regardless of the difficulties of your life situation, you have. This is what can cause the maliciousness of skeptics: they say, and if nothing brings joy? And if it is impossible to perform your "joyful actions" in the circumstances?
The answers to these questions, however, are very simple. Firstly, if joy does not deliver anything, it means that joy does not deliver anything that you ALREADY did. So, we must try to do something new, and not try to do, but to do the same and do well. And secondly ... However, "secondly" is the same as "firstly": if you do something in the circumstances, it doesn’t work, it means that it doesn’t work in tried and tested ways. So maybe do something completely unexpected?
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- Feel happy!
- Phrases that will change your life